"Don't Think Twice"

Hello.

It's been a rare couple of weeks since I last updated for real. I'm doing OK. I wouldn't go so far as to say I'm amazing, but I'm not in the gutter either. The last update I gave was from frigging Zanzibar. A world of things happen in this place when you're not looking. I'll just jump around a bit and we'll see if we can't get yall' updated.

Some of you knew, some didn't, I was smoking again. I oficially quit again...kind of. I'm trying to just cut way down. There is another volunteer here named Gaylan from Canada who smokes. We're doing the 4 in 4 days, 3 in 3 days, 2...you get the idea. I'm hoping it works this time and no matter what, I can't smoke in the monestary in Nepal. I'll light up a smoke and they'll be like "uh-uh, no you di-it int"!

The three other Americans left the house. Ken is now in SE Asia (miss you brother), Sarah is probably in UCSB by now (how is Adriana), and Jamie is in Bagamoyo (did Jeff give you maleria?). How is a cowboy supposed to piss off the world and bomb people alone? Oh well, guess I'll just be peaceful and all that. The dynamic in the house has switched from loud to calm. Ruth is from England, Gaylan and Alicia are from Canada (and engaged). And there is still of course,Quinn, with whom this time in Africa has been made wonderful. We're all a bunch of readers now, yes even me. I've been reading books in 2-3 days. WOAH!!! Those of you who know me well know that I don't really read that much and this is amazing. The others of you who thought I read a bunch of books...SUCKERS!!!

I've started worshiping Bamboocha. I chant and bow. It's unhealthy.

Quinn and I went to the Bagamoyo Arts Festival which is put on by the Bagamoyo Arts College. The Lonely Planet says that the annual festival is the "pulse of the arts community in East Africa". The acts came from 12 different countries in Africa from South Africa and Sudan to Kenya and Tanzania, of course. It was amazing. There was traditional dance music with booty dancers (it's all about the booty here in Africa). We saw drumming, drumming, and more drumming. Why not, they invented it. There were a lot of kids acts. They flipped, contorted, balanced, and they DAAAAAAAAAANCED. One of the wierdest parts of the weekend was that Africans don't really applaude. An act would finish and a few people would kind of clap but mostly just sit there. I would yell and clap and make a fuss, but you know me. We got to spend some time with Jamie (who I get along famously with now) and her new roomate Jeff. Jeff got wasted every night he was there and I couldn't imagine why he was there? Its one thing to get wasted at home but in Africa? Whatever, maybe I'm the one missing out. We ended up hitching a ride home with a woman from Michigan who has lived in Tanzania for 10 years now. She is a teacher in Mwenge and had some wicked good stories for us. A great trip to the place that I supposed to be volunteering in the first place.

I whittled chess pieces with Gaylan out of candles. After we were done we played and I won. I knee hurts all the time, but has not gotten worse in the whole time I've been here. The water runs out constantly which makes for a stinky Nathan. There are so many problems with the organization that I'm here with I wouldn't know where to start if I had time to tell you. We're going to write what Bethany would call a "strongly worded letter" (Oh God I miss Bethany) to GVN. I rode on the dalla-dalla the other and it was as full as any vehicle I've ever seen in my life. I grabbed the bar on the inside and rode hanging outside of the van. Very African of me. My flight to Kathmandu from Bombay has been canceled. Everyone told me I would change when I came here but I have yet to see it, even though it's happening, and it will happen more later. I'm still Nathan.

Mama Rose is amazing as usual. She is a constant source of inspiration to me. Her, her boys, the kids. Mama teaches a class of about 50 while about 25 split off to get taught by Teacher Jennifer. Mamas class is comprised of 3-5 year olds. The 3 year olds don't know thier ABC's and count to about 3 and stall out. The 5 year olds can run circles around these kids. I decided that since I'm not the best teacher (what can I say, as much as I love them, I'm not a Day), maybe there could be something I could offer. I decided that with all the unused space Mama Rose has, she needed another space for the 5 year olds. I'm renovating one of the rooms in her school. These room basically havn't been touched in about 4 years and terrible things are going on inside. I'm halfway thorugh the process and it's the best decision I've made since I got here. This is a way my help can last way past October 15th. This is a way I can feel worthy of being around this group without feeling like I've taken more than I've given.

-Spray for bugs
-Get the big pieces of debris out
-Dust everything
-Clean walls
-Clean floors
-Paint walls
-Wrap wires and cover sockets
-Make chalkboard (this is where I am now, and you couldn't possibly imagine the project that this has been)

It's good work and I'm feeling good about it. There have been downers that I'm not going to go into here but like The Dude says "strikes and gutters". I guess the gutter balls and gong shows seem worse when you're quitting smoking. I've decided to give Mama Rose money every day I don't smoke to replace the packs. Not a bad idea but I'm wigging out and I need a smoke. This is a trip for the ages. It's all happening. I wish you could all see this with me. In a way you are all here with me. All of you make me who I am. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I guess I'll just keep on-keepin' on.

Salaama,

Nathan

ps-If the spelling sucks it's because I've run out of time at the internet cafe and honestly I don't care. I love you.

"Somebody Spoke and I Went Into a Dream"

7:00am -7:30am - I wake up to the sounds of volunteers trudging through my room to use the bathroom. Having the water closet in your room has its ups and downs, this is one of the downs.

7:31am - POWER CUT (everyday)

7:45am - Eat breakfast which usually consists of; Hard Boiled Eggs (sometimes), Bread (toasted when Quinn remembers or if the power is on), Penut Butter (When we but it), Jam (I buy the strawberry but they supply some mixed fruit concoction that is unsavory at best), Water, Passion Fruit Juice, Coffee, and Tea.

8:00am-8:30am - Witty banter with the other volunteers who are obviously locuacious in the morning something that those of you who know me well, know I am not.

8:45am - Walk down the street to Mama Roses and say "Mambo", "Salaama", and "Shikamoo" to everone I see (Africans seem to wake me up).

9:00am - Arrive at Mama Roses. Every moring when I walk through the door all of the kids in broken unison say "Goooooooo Mooooorniiiiiing Teeeeeeachahhhhhhhh". When 60 beautiful children greet you in the morning like that it's easy to check every negative thing atthe door.

9:15am - 11:30am - Class time. I usually struggle to help for the first hour but then when the kids are doing thier work I have a chance to work with them one on one. I'm not a trained teacher but there is a difference between taching a full class and helping someone to pronounce "ship" (Rukia totally got it yeasterday. I was so proud). I find myself relying on what I learned growing up. Of particular help is that wierd looking guy on Sesame Street that would sound things out and pull them together. "Shhhhhhhhhh...iiiiiiiii......pp, Shhhhh...iii....p, Shhhh...i...p, Sh...i...p, ship, ship, SHIP"!

11:30am - 12:30pm is the recess/porridge time. Porridge tastes like milk and tapioca pudding except bland. Mama Rose always insists that I have some. I insist that I'll eat after every child has some. There is always some left. I run around in the 90+ degree heat with kids who act like it's a cool spring day. After I look like I've taken a dip in the sweat pool I help organize the kids and tie shoes and watch all of these kids, 60 mind you, pile into a dalla-dalla that can fit maybe 14 adults comfortly. I sit around afterwards and talk to Mama Rose, Jennifer, and Mamas 4 sons who help out. I walk back to my house.

12:45pm - 1:45pm - I sit around and wait for lunch to get in. When it does it's usually rice or ugali (a local dish like polenta). There's also beans or lentils and that pretty much sums up the lunch fare. MMMMMMMMMM.

1:45pm - 2:45 or 3:00pm - Nap time. The heat takes over me and I've never been up at 7am consistantly, ever. Maybe in school, but even then, I feel like I worked around it.

3:00pm - Read, play chess, or head to the beach for a dip. This is also the time where I might go to the internet or supermarket if I have to. This is also local travl time to just explore something new. Basically, whatever I want.

6:00pm - 7:30pm - Dinner is served. The best thing about this time is all the volunteers are there and we talk about our day and what we did. One big happy family. Usually a little more appealing than lunch with the apperence of meat sometimes. Beans are popular along with potatos in a gravy. The best thing we get are chipates. They are kind of like torilla wraps but better. They are served warm and when they are with flavored cabbage, it's a little slice of heaven right here in Dar. I also am sure to wash everything down with a Bamboocha (orange Fanta). I never thought a cola could steal my heart like Diet Coke, but low and behold, The Bamboocha.

7:31pm - POWER REGAIN

7:30pm - 9:30pm - More free time. I usually journal for a little while and then maybe read or play some wired game with the Canadian Couple who seem to be ready and competitive to play any and every thing. I have to put on the bug stuff because htis is when those muderous little mosquitos come out. If we have water sometimes I take a bucket shower. FUN!

9:30pm - 10:00pm - Day is done. I climb into bed and tuck in the mosquito netting. I read for a little bit and when I get sleepy I turn in. I've been praying a lot lately. Being on this trip has brought me even closer to God. I pray for Bethany and our baby. I pray for all of you who read this and the ones who don't. I pray for every one I have met on my trip and for those I have not yet met. I pray for Africa. I always pray that God's grace and love be shown to everyone and that I'll have a relitivaly safe journey. Speaking of Journey...

"DON'T STOP BELIEVEIN. HOLD ON TO THAT FEEEEELAIAN'"

Rafiki, Rafiki! Ohhhhhh Zanzibar.

Mambo,

Quinn, Sarah, and I left in the morning on Friday. It was still dark out when we arrived by taxi at the ferry docks. Should you ever take the ferry to Zanzibar early in the morning, try not to show up while it's still dark out. SCETCHY!!! We did however make it on the boat unscathed. The trip from Dar to Zanzibar went by pretty quickly for me, I just put some Led on and passed out. When I awoke the water was a different shade of greenish blue than I had ever seen. The island looked like it was cut out of a book that I should have, but never read. We stepped off the boat into another world.

The first person we met off the boat was a guy who called himself Mr. Banana. For those of you who are privey, this WAS Adieudu. His voice was deep and he was a huge man. "Don't peel Mr. Banana, Ha, Ha, Ha". We ditched that guy, cleared immagration, and found our driver. On our way out of Stone Towne, we stoped so I could get some new sandels. The only pair that fit were these hidious yellow things on my feet. I asked Quinn and she lied and told me they were hot so I got them. We drove for an hour to the east coast of the island and arrived at Pongwe Resort.

We wanted to splurge for one night and this was the place that I picked. Awesome choice. We got introduced by Heidi from Zimbabwe to the ins and outs of everything at the hotel. I think thats the first time I've been given an intake at a hotel. We went to our room and the coolest thing was proabably that we had hot water for showers. After we soaked in the room we went to the water to soak up tropical goodness. The beach was so secluded seeing as there were about only 20 other people there. This place only has like 10 bungalos and we were sticking out like a sore thumb seeing as we were not on our honeymoon. Quinn and I both lamented the absence of our loves. I miss Bethany, I miss Bethany, I miss Bethany. After we swam and sat in the sun, I met a cool couple from Germany. They were, yup, on their honeymoon. We planned with them to go snorkeling in the morning. We played Scrabble in the evening and I got my ass kicked by Quinn who apparently is a world class Scrabble player. Just so everyone knows, AH is a word. They challenged me on that and I lost at a critical point in the game. Whatever, I'm over it. That night we had dinner on the beach, which is something they don't do very often. We sat with Frank and Dani (the cute German couple), and had some amazing food. After dinner, and still on the beach, we were treated to a Massai dance. 5 Massai guys chanting and jumping, so incredibly cool. We went to sleep on a soft bed, another luxery these days, and dreamed of monkeys and Stone Towne.

Quinn and I woke up at the break of dawn and went outside to see the sun which had just risen. I only mention this because I probably took the coolest picture that I've ever taken. We took a boat to go snorkeling and saw all sorts of stuff. Tropical fishes, coral reefs, and underwater creatures. I had to dive extra low to see them because I could'nt wear my glasses. The day was already good and it wasn't even 9am. We had breakfast and killed time on the beach untill it was time to go to Jozani Forest.

We arrived at Jozani, fed Quinn (she's cute as hell but can be unruley if she dosn't have food in her), and met our guide. We were walking for about 5 minutes and there they were. Red Colbus monkeys. There were only a few at first but then as I got used to my surroundings they came out of the woodwork. There were about 20-25 in the troop and they were everywhere. We got to get right up close to them and oh my god, we did. I took so many pictures and just watched them. This is the closest thing to a safari I'm going to get to do and I just milked it. They were cute but also fascinating in the way they moved and ate. After the monkeys we went for a walk to see the Mangrove trees. There was a boardwalk that led us through a swamp with all sorts of different kinds of fish. The trees were interlocked at the bottom and the boardwalk was wild looking. Hard to describe cool to do!

After Jozani we went to Stone Towne. This is the heart of Zanzibar and about 90% Muslim. The whole place has an island vibe, but before this the only island vibe I knew was Hawaii, Key West, Monhegan. This was vastly different but similar. We walked to a place called Mercury's for dinner. It's named after Freddie Mercury, the lead singer of Queen, who was born a few blocks away. Interesting thing, a restaurant honering a gay man in a place where if you are openly gay you are prosecuted. Decent food and drink but we were tired and we were taking on the city in the morning.

We were awoken that morning with the Islamic call to prayer at 5am. It's so cool to hear that over the loud speaker asking thousands of people for their worship. I've gotten used to being woken up by roosters so this was a pleasent change. We started our walk through Stone Towne and all I can say is that this was so different than anything ever. The narrow streets covered in cobblestone in the labryinth of this city were so exotic to me. The smells emanting from the little shops and the sounds of the people were wild! The only downside were how aggresive the touts were. "Rafiki, where are you from, whats your name, buy this CD". Rafiki=friend.

"Rafiki",Rafiki","Rafiki". Ohhhhh Zanzibar. I did buy a lot of Christmas presents and as aggresive as they were, the place was so damn cool, I figured, who cares! We walked around all day and ended up in a little cafe called the Archipeligo (did I spell that right Sarah cause God knows I can't say it). These little bugs pulled their best Bush administration on us and bombarded us from the air. It was a hassle but all part of Africa.

The next morning we got up and went spice shopping. I got all sorts of stuff including Curry, which is now a personal favorite. Chili stuff for my Pop (you're gonna love this tuff big guy). All these spices would've costed so much back home. It was next to nothing here. We walked around and tied up some loose ends and we were on our way to the airport. I got to sit co-pilot on the way back in a small plane and I instantly felt like an 8 year old. We returned back to Dar and I'm now gearing up for the second half of my stay in Africa.

Quinn and Sarah were about as close to perfect traveling partners as you can get. They were willing to do anything and fun to be with. Zanzibar was everything I thought it might be and more. It's a place I want to go back to and bring my family. I even got a Muslim hat and shirt so that when I go back I can wish peace to everyone. In fact why don't I do that right now...

Asalaam Milakum

Nathan

I'm Finally Here

So I'm finally here. My ass caught up with me after being in London the last week. A few things first. Mama Rose is amazing. The only thing cooler than her actually is the other side of the pillow. Her and I were talking the other day and I told her that it felt like I was selfish because I was getting so much more from her and the kids than I could ever give. It's the most honest thing I can say. I went into town with Ken (the new volunteer who brought a guitar YEAH!!!) and Quinn (probably the most awesome Canadien since Ray Bourque). I bought 80 work books, 100 pencils, 10 sharpeners, and a bunch of erasers. I wrote in each one, with the help of Quinn and Sarah, the alphabet and 123... It felt good to bring them in and see the kids when I gave them out. I've been reading the bible and one of the things that Jesus taught us is that giving charity should be done in secret, well I Gong Showed that! Sorry JC.

I'm about as dirty as I've ever been and I don't mean in a porn sort of way I mean there is a filth on me, especially on my feet, that isn't going to come off for a long time. My clothes are never really clean, they just cease to smell which is good enough for me. The whole thing is fine. I don't mind being this dirty. It reminds me of camping and being a kid. Mom, was I always dirty? Bef, Amamam I dirtee Boy, cause, I tink it's...um..nice (oh wow, annoying voice in a journal, moving on).

I've broken one of my sandals so now I have a pink one and my American Eagle leather one. There is a smell in the air that I've never really smelled before. There are no landfills here and dump trucks are just sort of out of the question. What they do instead is collect enough garbage and then torch it. It makes for quite a smell and it's everywhere. It smells like ganja to be honest, and when that stuff is as readily available as it is, I have a hard time distinguishing. The dust, the heat, the bugs. Oh yes, I'm finally here.

Theres something else going on. I've struggled about what it is I want to write because I'm kind of on the defense about it. The dishonesty is everywhere. It's like the burning of garbage, you can't escape it. I feel like I could float on through the next month and a half and not confront it, but would I still be the man I want to be? I've been asking myself why I am here, in this place right now with the people that I'm with. The answer is simple for me, God wants me here. Maybe I can't see it clearly right now, but I know that bigger things are happening than I know what to do with. We're figuring it out and I'll be less cryptic about this in the future. I'm on it. The mix of dishonesty and warmth is amazing. What a gift to be in such a place. I have made so many friends that I will cherish. It's amazing, the people you meet in a place like this. So many things, so many things.

I'm off to Zanzibar in the morning with Quinn and Sarah for a long weekend of what my English friends would call, fuck all. I'm so looking forward to this time to chill out and regain my energy. I've recently been realizing more and more how everyone in my life has helped to shape the person that I am. All of you have made it possible and I feel you here with me at all times. I'm praying for all of you and hope that you are doing so well. I'm finally here and there is no where else I'd rather be.

Love,

Nathan